At A Glance: Our Top 4 Picks for Vacuum Penis Pumps
- Bathmate HydroXtreme7OUR TOP PICK
- Penomet
- Hydromax7
- Bathmate Hydro7
| IMAGE | PRODUCT | ||
|---|---|---|---|
Our Top Pick  | Our Top Pick | Bathmate HydroXtreme7
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 | Penomet
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 | Hydromax7
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 | Bathmate Hydro7
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We’ve become about as popular these days as the products we review, but it’s blessing and a curse. 
Everyone we know wants the inside scoop on the best penis pumps on the market. Apparently, our career choice leads everybody to believe we know where the good shit is; and indeed, we do.
Our expertise in the sex toy and couple’s therapy arena is undeniable. In other words, we know a thing or two about everything, including penis pumps.
Yes, our professionally perverted asses have dabbled in the arts of penis enhancement for many years. It’s sort of like how a pro race car driver might pimp out his car because that’s his career.
Fucking is life, wouldn’t you agree? So, we want to show up to the race with the best car on the track. That means spending a bunch of time testing out the various penis pumps that flood the modern market.
We could leave our readers helpless, searching willy-nilly online for a pump that offers halfway satisfying results. Most of the time, however, those guys wind up ripped off and pissed off. Consider us the spokesmen for the contemporary cock, the heroes of humping.
We know that even large and in-charge dudes could stand a penis pick-me-up, but since the demand for pumps is so heavy we often find disreputable merchants pushing products that are disappointing at best. That shit ends now.
Shop Around, Read Our Reviews & Look For The Top Penis Pump On The Market!
The majority of people are not like us; they have not tested every penis pump on the market for a paycheck. The average Joe uses information given by the seller to make a buying decision. That crap is dangerous, especially considering how most merchants are completely full of shit.
Knowing what makes a good dick stretcher is your first job. The rest is a matter of personal preference.
Remember, not all penis pumps are created equally. Cost is not always an indication of quality, and even high-end brands and churn out shitty products every now and then.
Using due diligence can help you reach your growth goals, and it can save you some money and embarrassment too. We learned all that the hard way, which is why we want to share our knowledge with you. Our handy dandy penis pump buying guide should give you a good place to start.
CLICK HERE TO FIND THE BEST PRICE ON THE INTERNET
Keys to Consider Before Buying a Penis Pump
- Effectiveness – Above all else, nobody wants to spend money on a tool that does nothing. What the hell is the point in that? Double check that your pump of choice has worked for other people before you spend a single cent on it. Start with customer reviews but don’t stop there. They all promise amazing results, and some even pay people to write rave reviews. Don’t be a sucker.
- Size – Although pumps are innately designed to help guys grow bigger dicks, even dudes with fat cocks want to make improvements on occasion. Make sure the size of the chamber will accommodate your unique girth or else you’ll be awkwardly returning it for something else.
- Scientific Research – One of the best ways to determine if a penis pump is worth its weight: the scientific data backing its design. Not all products on the market have this, unfortunately. However, it makes shopping for the best pumps easier than ever. You might have hated school, but now is the time to do your homework. Is your favorite penis pump made using industry standard techniques or should you reconsider your options?
- Durability – Good things come in all shapes and sizes. It’s the durability of the tool that matters most. Considering many penis pumps must be used for several weeks before optimal results are reached, you’ll want to be sure you purchase something that’s in it to win it. Silicone, polyurethane, and resin are terrific materials; go with that.
- Materials – Speaking of silicone and all that, the materials used to make the penis pump matter more than you think. Skin-safe products prevent chaffing, and that’s important for a device that is sometimes worn for hours at a time. Think about it guys; this is your dick we’re talking about.
- Discretion – Unless you’re a socially awkward fuck, letting people know that you use a penis pump is one of the last things you want. It doesn’t matter if its medical or cosmetic, you probably want to keep that shit to yourself. So, opt for a product that comes with a carrying case or, at the very least, a box big enough to double as a storage unit.
- User Friendliness – Some of today’s most effective penis pumps would be so much better if they weren’t so damn difficult to use. Strapping on a pump shouldn’t feel like a high school science project. Search for a tool that’s user friendly unless, of course, you have a degree in engineering. Then by all means, use the complicated contraptions. We don’t give a shit.
- Appearance – They say looks aren’t everything, but tell that to the last person who looked at your tiny dick. We’ll bet they didn’t expect much. Appearances can be deceiving; keep that in mind. Although a pump looks complicated or even (gasp) hideous, it may be the best option on the market. Don’t be so fucking vain, you desperate assholes.
- Cost – At the end of the day, price is something that matters to us all. We are not members of the Rockefeller family, we’ve got bills. Boosting our penile prowess is super exciting and very important, but so is having heat and lights. Spending too much on a pump is ridiculous unless, of course, it’s a miracle machine. Then, we might consider refinancing our house if the shit really works.
Our Top 4 Best Penis Pumps For Men In 2023:
#1 The Bathmate HydroXtreme 7 – Best Penis Pump Overall
The HydroXtreme series from the well-known Bathmate brand is hailed as one of the best penis pumps in all the land, and the reasons for that are quite clear once you take a gander at all this delicious device has to offer.
The HydroXtreme 7 model is the second smallest of the five in the series, but it certainly packs a punch for its relatively compact size. Using the same powerful suction power as the others, it maximizes penile growth potential in a convenient and innovative way – all packaged inside a masculine and sturdy storage container that has a polished silver zipper and handle loop for easy travel.
Users of this marvelous machine reap the benefits by simply pumping the handball to increase pressure inside the transparent polycarbonate tube. Rumor has it, regularly waterboarding your dick with this thing can produce noticeable improvements to your overall penis size, erection quality and sexual stamina.
It’s ideal for experienced pumpers, but rudimentary enough in its design to suffice for beginners as well. On top of that, everyone gets a free accessory kit with their purchase and a 60-day money-back too.
PROS
- Good for beginners and pros
- Advanced handball pump makes suction control super easy
- Available in a “Wide Boy” version for men with extra girth
- Can be used in water or open air
- May cause immediate results
- Upgraded models available for continual growth
- Results are semi-permanent to permanent
- Made from medical-grade, skin-safe materials
- Comes with an accessories kit and storage container
- Risk-free purchasing power
CONS
- Only for men with a penis size between 5 and 7 inches
- Requires a daily commitment of 15-20 minutes
- Results may vary
- Somewhat expensive by comparison
- Not medically endorsed
OVERALL OPINION: This one has everything you need to start increasing your penile potential immediately, given you’re comfortable with a 100% manually powered penis pump and you don’t mind using your device primarily in water because that’s where it works the best.
#2 The Penomet
The Penomet is one of those penis pumps that makes other penis pumps nervous when it comes around. As the industry’s first and only medically certified penis pump, this thing does not mess around.
Not only does it use a revolutionary interchangeable gaiter system that allows you to gradually increase the chamber’s pressure, but it also utilizes over two years of dedicated research to bring you temporary results in as little as 15 minutes. With regular use, the Penomet promises a semi-permanent increase in penile length by 30% at least.
The main cylinder is made from industrial-strength polycarbonate plastic while the gaiters are finished in a silky-smooth, skin-safe silicone. The Penomet device itself features a built-in precision measurement scale for your convenience, and the 360-pressure release valve makes this one of the safest and most user-friendly penis pumps on the planet.
Maybe that’s why it won the Best New Male Enhancement Device Award back in 2013 and the Venus Award back in 2014. Either way, the company is confident enough to offer your money back if you’re not completely satisfied.
PROS
- Endorsed by independent doctors and researchers
- Interchangeable gaiter system for enhanced customization
- Upgraded models available for continual growth
- May cause immediate results
- Results are semi-permanent to permanent
- Helps decrease the frequency of premature ejaculation
- Boosts sexual stamina
- Medically proven to reverse Peyronie’s Disease
- Can be used in water or open air
- Made from medical-grade, skin-safe materials
- Comes in 7 fun colors
- Award-winning design
- Risk-free purchasing power
CONS
- Results may vary
- Some assembly required
- Brand’s rigorous online penis workout routine must be followed
- Not ideal for beginners
OVERALL OPINION: This winner is surprisingly simple for a high-tech, medically endorsed penis pump. It makes you feel powerful, sensible and successful, although it also requires a manual transmission to achieve optimal suction in the chamber (and that can be exhausting).
#3 The HydroMax 7
The HydroMax 7 is said to have a high customer satisfaction rating because it possess three very important qualities: 1) It’s powerful and effective, with a simple workout routine that requires very little commitment on your part, 2) It’s versatile and user-friendly, able to be used in or out of the water and well-behaved during travel, and 3) It’s designed to maximize your penis’s potential by making the organ a better performer all-around.
Hailed as “the average man’s penis pump,” the HydroMax 7 is ideally sized, intuitively crafted and surprisingly powerful for a manually operated device.
Boasting 35% more power than the original HydroPump series that was introduced several years ago, the HydroMax 7 now stands above the rest because of its ergonomic design and body-conscious sizing.
Ideal for men with a penis length of between 5 and 7 inches, this thing is perfect for beginners and expert pumpers alike, with cousin devices on standby for continual growth. On top of that, the manufacturer stands by its promise of quality and efficacy by offering a money-back guarantee, awesome customer service and a price that would make anyone smile.
PROS
- Made from high-grade, skin-safe materials
- Ideal for beginners and pros
- Requires no manual handball pumping
- Results are semi-permanent to permanent
- Helps with penis length and girth
- Aids in making erections harder, stronger and longer-lasting
- Uses a simple online workout routine
- Comes in three fun colors
- Measuring gauge provided on the side of the chamber
- Increases sexual stamina and penis size
- Can be used in water or open air
- Risk-free purchasing power
CONS
- Lasting results can take as long as month to achieve
- No storage container or accessories provided
- Requires a significant time commitment
- Not medically endorsed
- Results may vary
OVERALL OPINION: This one strikes me as the beginner’s best friend, with features that are easy to use and fun to experiment with. Just make sure you exercise patience because noticeable results can take a while.
#4 Bathmate Hydro 7
The Bathmate Hydro 7 is a device that will revolutionize your bath time routine. As the Bathmate brand’s most basic penis pump, it’s still one of the most powerful machines in the industry.
Great for beginners but also ideal for the pros, this thing has everything you need without all the fancy bells and whistles you don’t. Simple, elegant and complete, the overall design is flawless and the execution is equally impressive.
And according to the proud manufacturer, the standard-grade Hydro 7 remains an intimidating contender on today’s penis pump market.
So, how could something some rudimentary cause such a stir around otherwise luxury-grade, high-tech models? Well, it’s because the Hydro 7 is a member of a 3-part series that has gained the attention of men from all over the world.
The skin-safe materials, transparent polycarbonate cylinder and built-in tracking ruler are only the start of what has become a global best-seller. Add in the fact that the manufacturer has also started incorporating a set of optional vibrating bullets and you can see why so many people are talking about the Bathmate brand.
PROS
- Made from high-grade, skin-safe materials
- Ideal for beginners, but powerful enough for pros
- Requires no handball pumping
- Measuring gauge provided on the size of the chamber
- Compatible with the Hydro Vibe vibrating bullet
- Increases penis length and girth
- Results are semi-permanent to permanent
- Comes in three fun colors
- Uses a simple workout routine
- Can be used in water or open air
- Risk-free purchasing power
CONS
- Requires a significant time commitment
- Results may vary
- No storage container provided
- Not medically endorsed
OVERALL OPINION: This one is marketed as a penis pump for beginners, but that vibrating bullet accessory launches it into the big leagues. Not quite as powerful as the HydroXtreme series from the same brand, and certainly not as favored by medical professionals as the Penomet, this bad boy walks the line between fun and functional.
AUTHOR’S NOTE: All of the penis pumps listed here feature pressure release valves for safety.
Penis Pump FAQ
Q: How do I know which is the best penis pump to choose?
A: Picking out the perfect penis pump is always a matter of personal preference unless otherwise stated by a physician. However, it may be necessary to consult with a doctor if you have erectile dysfunction or suffer from Peyronie’s Disease.
As a general rule, you should always choose the device that best suits your goals, your needs, your limitations, your lifestyle and your budget. See my penis pump buyer’s guide for more information.
Q: What’s the difference between a penis extender and a penis pump?
A: A penis pump uses manual and/or automatic suction to draw blood to the surface of the skin, resulting in a temporary or semi-permanent increase in penile length, girth and sensitivity.
Results may be instantaneous or gradual depending on the device and your use of it. A penis extender, on the other hand, uses long-term traction to induce hyperplasia (cell division), resulting in a relatively painless and permanent boost to penile size, shape and functionality.
Q: If traction makes my penis grow, then how does suction work to increase the size and thickness or improve the shape of my junk?
A: Traction is defined simply as pulling on a specific part of the body to produce a favorable result. In terms of penile enhancement, traction is used to initiate a completely natural process called cell hyperplasia – an event which causes the penile cells to split and double, thereby increasing the length and girth of the shaft.
Suction is just another way of applying traction to the penile tissues, although not quite as intensely. Therefore, a well-made penis pump may be used as an alternative to or alongside a penis extender for maximum growth potential.
Q: Does more suction always mean more results?
A: Usually, an increase in suction is directly related with an increase in penile growth results. The stronger the stretch or pull, the more likely your penis is to respond. However, it’s important to note that extreme levels of suction should be applied gradually and only by advanced users or by those under the care of a professional.
Q: Are there any side effects associated with wearing a penis enhancement device that uses suction?
A: The side effects that you experience will be based on how you use the device in question. In general, the only expected side effects should be a noticeable increase in your penis size (length and circumference) and maybe a boost to your self-confidence, sexual stamina, and arousal.
If you experience any redness, skin irritation or pain, stop using the device immediately and consult customer service and your doctor as soon as possible.
Q: Do my lifestyle habits affect the results of the penis pump I’m using?
A: Unlike pills, potions and lotions, penis pumps work regardless of what you do as long as you use them as directed. Although you’re generally free to enjoy the things you love in life, including alcoholic beverages and tobacco, some penis enhancement devices do ask that you engage in more mindful behaviors for the duration of the treatment.
This is especially true with products that include rigorous exercise routines and/or progress tracking, plus we all know the pitfalls of whiskey dick.
Q: Do I need to be on a special diet to encourage penis growth with my pump?
A: While no penis pump manufacturer requires a special diet plan for their product or the exercise routine associated with it, there have been countless studies on the correlation between penile health and nutrition.
As with anything in life, your efforts are bound to be more successful if your body has what it needs to function at max potential.
Q: How do I get the penis pump off if I’ve made my penis larger than it was when I put it in the chamber?
A: First of all, the best penis pump will always feature a conveniently placed pressure release valve to ensure safety and promote easier customization. With that said, your pump is designed to let go of your plumped penis when the show is over.
As long as all the pressure has been successfully eliminated from the chamber before you start tugging, everything should be good to go. Use a little water-based personal lubricant if it makes you feel better.
Q: Can I have sex or masturbate while using a penis pump?
A: Many penis pumps are designed to give you immediate results so that you can start having sex and/or masturbating as soon as possible. Most of the time, those instant results aren’t permanent though, so don’t expect to be a dynamo in bed until you’ve completed the suggested workout routine for your device and can reap the benefits of your hard work.
As a consolation prize, having sex and/or masturbating after you pump can improve sexual pleasure due to the increased blood flow in your penis.
Q: Can I still use a penis pump if I’m uncircumcised?
A: Yes. Today’s best penis pumps can be used regardless of whether you’re circumcised or uncircumcised. Just be sure you put it on correctly so it doesn’t pinch or pull on your skin instead of your shaft. In fact, that’s one of the most common complaints among all penis pump users – foreskin bearing or otherwise.
Q: Will I have to shave off my pubic hair to use a penis pump?
A: No, you can keep the bush if you so choose. Manscaping is not required, but it’s sometimes recommended for men with very small penises or for guys who wear their device really close to their balls just to prevent snagging and pulling.
Q: Should I apply personal lubricant to my penis or the pump to make it more comfortable when I’m putting it on, taking it off or wearing it?
A: Usually, no lube is required to use a penis pump. In fact, it’s generally frowned upon because it can cause the device to slip out of position. However, feel free to apply a tiny dollop if your device begins to rub or irritate your skin at the contact point (or if it gets stuck).
Q: How often do I have to use my penis pump to see results?
A: The frequency with which you must use any penis pump depends on the device itself, but most of them call for scheduled and/or carefully timed use. Many manufacturers require pumpers to wear their device for several minutes per day, while other options require only 20-30 minutes a few times per week.
On the bright side, most pumps are made to show significant results immediately, if not within a few weeks. Your time commitment will vary greatly from product to product.
Q: How often do I have to clean my penis pump?
A: You’ll want to clean your penis pump after every single use, even if you don’t apply lubrication to your penis. Dead skin cells, sweat, dirt, debris and bacteria have an uncanny way to finding their way into your pump’s chamber.
And since your penis has an opening on the tip that’s prone to infection, it’s important to keep your pump’s cylinder and other components tidy. Unless otherwise specified by the manufacturer, the average penis pump can be cleaned by using warm water and a hypoallergenic, antibacterial soap or toy cleaning product.
Q: Does it hurt to use a penis pump?
A: No. If the device is used correctly, it should never hurt to wear a penis pump. As a rule of thumb, never wear a penis pump for more than 30 minutes at a time. Remember, your penis should always be flaccid when you put the device on.
Keep in mind as well that you may experience a slight pinch to your penile skin and/or balls when the device is being adjusted too hastily or if its ergonomics aren’t on focused on comfort. Don’t forget to use the customizable safety features to your advantage.
Q: Are all penis pumps one-size-fits-all devices?
A: Not all penis pumps are made the same. Most are made for general size versatility but there’s always a limit to what a nuts-and-bolts device can accommodate. Fortunately, the good ones are either adjustable, customizable or available in several different sizes to grow at the same pace as you do.
Q: How much growth can I expect if I use a high-end penis pump exactly as directed?
A: All penis pumps are different and produce unique results. However, the best devices will most likely make your penis grow in length by at least a couple inches in length and circumference.
And if you get the right product, use it correctly, and endure through the entire process, you could enjoy things like increased sexual stamina and improved erectile function as well.
Q: How long does it take to see results from using a penis pump?
A: The length of time it takes to reach your personal growth goals with a penis pump will vary greatly depending in several factors, including but not limited to:
- Your beginning size
- Your body type
- Your commitment to the proposed workout routine
- Your device choice
- Your lifestyle habits
Today’s best devices range from one month to six months for optimal results, but some may produce slight growth after a single use.
Q: Are the results of my penis pump permanent or do I have to keep using it forever?
A: If you purchase a well-made penis pump and you use it exactly as the manufacturer has directed, you should be able to enjoy a semi-permanent to permanent increase to the length and size of your penis.
If used to treat Peyronie’s Disease or erectile dysfunction, results may vary depending upon other factors. NOTE: Regular use of a penis pump, regardless of whether you’ve reached your growth goals or not, can increase your sexual performance tremendously.
Q: How will I know if the pump is really working for me or not?
A: Keep track of your penile growth by utilizing the tracking tools offered by most manufacturers – built-in measurement gauges, online forums, etc. Just be sure to take note of where you begin so you can monitor changes accurately.
Q: Can I wear my penis pump under my clothes or in my sleep?
A: If the device is designed to be worn under loose-fitting clothes, then by all means feel free to move around freely while your pump is in place.
However, it is NEVER recommended that you wear a penis pump overnight or for longer than 30 minutes at a time. Prolonged pressure to your penis can cause permanent nerve damage or irreversible erectile dysfunction.
Q: Will a penis pump cause bodily harm or nerve damage of any kind?
A: No, a penis pump cannot cause nerve damage to your penis unless you use it in an extremely idiotic way. In fact, most of today’s top devices are designed with a medical endorsement and some are even covered by private insurance.
In rare cases, idiots have managed to find a way to hurt themselves with these things, but you’re not one of those guys.
Q: If the penis pump that I purchase doesn’t work, can I get a refund?
A: Usually, consumers who buy a penis pump from a reputable company can have their purchase reimbursed by the manufacturer if no results are achieved within a specified amount of time. See the manufacturer’s details for more information on warranty policies.
Q: Will everyone know I’m trying to enhance my penis if I buy one of these things?
A: Not only do today’s penis pump manufacturers value discretion but they also offer a platform that keeps everyone’s privacy intact. By that I mean: 99% of the time, you can shop online with confidence knowing that your credit card statement won’t show anything incriminating and that the product itself will come to your door packaged in an unmarked box without any telling literature.
Putting Your Penis Pumps to the Test
Run your favorite penis pumps through the gamut to see if they passe the test.
We most certainly have, and that’s why we have an opinion on just about every one of them.
At this point, you can’t tell us anything we don’t already know. Experts we are, and experts you will be by the time we’re done with you.
Once you get yours, there are various techniques for using penis pumps, so make sure you learn from the experts.
These pumps work wonders while used with this top penis extender. Enjoy!